Download E-books Disco Pigs and Sucking Dublin (Nick Hern Books) PDF

By Enda Walsh

Two performs by way of the winner of the easiest Fringe creation Award on the 1996 Dublin Festival.

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Steve?? STEVE. the pinnacle on him! See that Lamb? Scare the shite out of him! LEP. Mad guy! STEVE roars into his face back. LEP. Get fuckin off ya spastic! Jesus! He’s mad Amanda! AMANDA. inform me approximately it! LEP. Shit me knickers there! STEVE. no longer on my sofa ya won’t! LITTLE LAMB (laughing). i believe I’m going ta piss me pants! STEVE. no longer the bleedin a yas! LEP. It’s your doin guy! LITTLE LAMB. Oh stop!! fats. am i able to use your jacks? STEVE. Fuckin correct ya can! AMANDA. Out via there. fats exits. STEVE. think that yoke crapping at the carpet! construct a roundabout to get round it! LITTLE LAMB. Ah cease! LEP. That’s my huge sis you’re slaggin! STEVE. close up you or it’s again on with the horns! Sounds of a giant crowd shouting ‘OUT OUT OUT’ are heard outdoor the door. AMANDA. Ah for fuck’s sakes! LITTLE LAMB. Jesus Christ! STEVE. forget about that! AMANDA. Are you serious?! LITTLE LAMB. while did this all commence? STEVE. They’ll be looked after out!! Don’t fear approximately that!! AMANDA. all started the day prior to this! LITTLE LAMB. Fuckin hell!! S’like a movie now or somethin!! They’ve received torches, glance! LEP. Y’all be burnt on the stake, Steve! no longer lengthy now, buddy! STEVE. simply forget about all of it right!! AMANDA. You have been intended ta get it taken care of, Steve!! STEVE. close yer fuckin catch! LITTLE LAMB. cross on, Steve! STEVE is going to the door. There are locks all of the approach down. He shouts out. STEVE. may ya all fuck off domestic now!! may be all tucked up in yer beddy byes, ya bleedin weirdos!! LEP. cross on, ya mad man!! STEVE. glance it, there’s no medicines right here, pal!! This flat is pure!! Yer barkin up the inaccurate tree, lads!! it is a drug loose area, (To AMANDA. ) is that what they name it? AMANDA. Yeah! STEVE (shouts). Drug free!! except the wife’s valium! AMANDA. inform the fuckin international why don’t ya! STEVE. Come on then!! destroy down the door!! Ya’d want twelve pound of Semtex ta shift that door!! strong metal look!! (Hammers the door together with his hand. ) Sounds from outdoors unexpectedly cease. Silence. STEVE. What approximately that! LITTLE LAMB. Fuckin hell! STEVE. Untouchable! AMANDA. What a rock star!! STEVE. a little of mild persuasion, Lamb! AMANDA. They’ll be again quickly sufficient! STEVE. Am I the one one gettin locked here?! LITTLE LAMB. no longer fuckin likely!! STEVE. Down the hatch and out yer gaash! LITTLE LAMB (screams). Presents!!! AMANDA. you were given them! LITTLE LAMB. Is that it? Poxy chain! AMANDA. Ya little complain! STEVE. fee a packet. LITTLE LAMB. A packet of Tayto probably! AMANDA. you recognize what to do with it sis! LITTLE LAMB. Messin!! AMANDA. greater be! LITTLE LAMB. Jesus! sit back at the jacks Amanda! STEVE. now not with that yoke in there! AMANDA (answering LITTLE LAMB). Yeah! STEVE. I’ve acquired you whatever else. LITTLE LAMB. What? STEVE. It’s anything small now! LITTLE LAMB. Come on provide us it. STEVE. Wrapped it meself. palms her a teddy undergo with none wrapping on it. LITTLE LAMB. Oh Jesus!! STEVE. adorable isn’t it! LITTLE LAMB. It’s beautiful! Ah glance in simple terms the only eye!! STEVE. exclusive! received anyone to appear for it specifically! LITTLE LAMB. lethal isn’t he! AMANDA. Am I the single one gettin locked here!? LITTLE LAMB. no longer fuckin likely!! fats enters. STEVE again then? fats. What do you think that? STEVE. i'll consider a planet movement into the room okay!

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